I met a friend at an event a few weeks ago. He’s still working and sees no alternative, not for financial reasons, but because, as he put it so clearly, “I have no idea what I’d do with myself. I used to love playing sports, but that’s it. I have no other interests.”
I shared with him that I had recently tried a pottery class where I had no skill but had a ton of fun exploring it. His eyes lit up as he told me he had also taken a pottery class with his daughter, and it was really fun. Then the hammer fell.
“I sucked at it,” he told me.
There it was. The self-sabotage that took something enjoyable and burned it down to ashes because of a lack of competency.
We talked a little more. I asked him why he wouldn’t expect to struggle at something he’d never done before. He pondered my question, and I decided he’d probably had enough of me.
His response was CLASSIC! So many men sabotage themselves through self-judgment. Why can’t there be simple enjoyment in the experience? Why can’t there be a mindset of learning rather than the destruction of joy?
Can you let go of your ego long enough to realize and embrace the gift of being a novice, the fun of learning, and the excitement of doing something different without the internal noise that sucks the energy out of the moment?
The next time you try something new, pay attention to the story you tell yourself.
