A characteristic of youth is the inability to understand subtleties and gauging appropriate reactions consistently.
I can look back at my career and the way I reacted to situations that I found to be unfavorable. I can honestly say that I did not suffer fools gladly and was quite vocal in my righteous indignation.
Today, I can see the toxicity of my reactions and that if I had possessed a greater level of awareness, maturity and sense of relativity, I would have done things differently.
I would have used Stephen Covey’s “habit”: to first seek to understand, then to be understood. I was too busy trying to be understood—understanding was not very important.
As we age, our ability to look back and recognize mistakes, missteps and errors in judgment grows. We can take those lessons and use them as fodder for growth. We can and should turn these lessons into wisdom. We can and should model behaviors for our children, grandchildren and our peers.
The concept of scale and relativity says that there is an appropriate response given the circumstances. It’s easier to create that level of appropriateness if you begin with a “no one died” scale and work from there. It’s not to say that you should let everything go, but it’s a place to begin to consider the right response.
Cheers,
Michael
